You know, I like southern California, but I don't know if I'll continue visiting there, because I get blamed for traffic trouble on I-5, what with all those women exclaiming, "Look at the shave on that guy in the rental car!" And now I'm starting to receive messages from guys blaming me for their forays into wetshaving. The one is possibly more gratifying than the other, but I find myself provoked to create The Anger of Compassion's Top Twenty Tips for Wetshaving Newbies.
1. Read the boards and learn from other wetshavers: ShaveMyFace and Badger and Blade. Take a look, also, at the archives of Corey Greenberg's (dormant and apparently discontinued) Shaveblog.
2. Pay attention to your blade angle: experiment, but at first, keep that head at approximately 30 degrees. A cartridge razor's flexible head does this for you. The head of a safety razor stays where it is.
3. Remember to keep that angle: in other words, don't bend your wrist as you shave. That head, again, is not flexible, as it is on a modern cartridge razor, so the proper angle must be maintained. By you.
4. The injunction "Apply no pressure" means just that: Apply. No. Pressure. Ever.
5. Before going over any area, rewet and relather it. No kidding.
6. Accept the inevitable: not only will you continue wetshaving once you try it, but you'll also succumb to some form of acquisition disorder. Whether it's razors, blades, soaps, brushes, creams, advertisements, mugs, whatever, something will grab you and you'll be hooked.
My own case is, I think, illustrative: I wanted Injectors and Super Speeds and wanted to try a variety of creams. Like, all of them. Blades, too. I felt myself immune to Shaving Brush Acquisition Disorder, and still do -- but I also remember declaring to loved ones that I would always be immune to Aftershave Acquisition Disorder. I was sincere, too. But I have about ten aftershaves in my shave shack as I type this. And two types of witch hazel.
Witch hazel, people. Heed my words.
7. Ice cubes. Yep. Take a few ice cubes and put them in a paper cup before you shower. Fill the cup the rest of the way with water. Each time you rinse your razor, dip it into the ice water and you'll be applying nice cold steel to your face as you shave. After you've finished shaving and rinsing, lightly rub what's left of the ice cubes on your face and neck. You'll thank me.
With a bit of experience, you won't be creating razor burn or irritation, but the ice cube/ice water rinse will still feel good.
8. Practice making lather, Grasshopper, especially if you're using soaps. And especially if you're in a hard water area. Look, I'm not saying that this is any sort of "When you can take the pebble out of my hand, it will be time for you to leave" martial arts thing. It's not. But it is a skill, so practice a little bit and learn it.
9. Watch Mantic's videos.
10. Now that I've written # 8, it occurs to me to offer this advice: begin with creams. It's simply far easier to create a workable lather with creams than with soaps. Kiss My Face and Tom's of Maine are widely available across the US -- but if you're reading this, you're on the internet, so you also have access to San Francisco's Nancy Boy and to Italy's Proraso -- both excellent formulations and excellent bargains as well -- and to the bespoke English creams.
11. You must come to The Straight Razor Understanding:
a. You are not yet ready to try shaving with a straight.
b. This doesn't make you less manly than those who use one.
c. You won't kill yourself when you do try one.
d. You are not yet ready to try shaving with a straight.
12. Fidelity vs. Variety: In wetshaving palance, "fidelity" refers to using the same gear and products on a regular basis. In this way, you learn how good your technique is as well as how much you like certain items (blades, razor, whatever). The problem with fidelity is that it runs smack into the wetshaver's desire for variety, hence the term "rotation."
13. This brings up another important wetshaving term: YMMV, as in, "Your Mileage May Vary." Whether we're talking about blades, brushes, razors, techniques, creams, soaps, aftershaves, or any other damn thing, we don't all like the same things and we don't all get the same results. Read the boards, yes, but your experience won't always match those you read about.
14. The "heritage scents" question: what about those traditional aftershave products from days gone by? I don't mean Billy the Kid's rose water, but traditional British concoctions like Trumper's Skin Food or those midcentury American alcohol-based potions like Old Spice, Aqua Velva, and Brut? Well, you may not have considered them before -- you may have never heard of the English stuff, and you may associate alcohol-based products with pain -- but the chances are very good that, as you pursue wetshaving and get better at wielding those blades, you'll find that you create less and less razor burn as time goes on. You may want to take another look at them.
15. YMMV, as it applies to blades: It happens to many guys that they love certain blades, but find those same blades to be really, really tough on their skin if used for three days in a row. Feathers and Injectors are notorious for this. The official Anger of Compasson/Bruce Lee solution? Don't use 'em for three days in a row.
16. Take a break, maybe one or both days on a weekend, from shaving.
17. Nirvana vs. variety. What is it you hope to gain from wetshaving? Some guys want shaving Nirvana: they want that perfect shave, that combination of gear and products resulting in perfection. Others want variety. Most of us, unfortunately, want a permanent melange of ... both. You're probably in this last group as well. There is no known cure for this malady.
18. Speaking of which, you won't be able to try it all, even in a month. I still haven't tried it all: a slant bar. A full straight razor shave. Derby blades. The Moss Scuttle. Pellas. Tabac. ARKO. Musgo Real. L'Occitane. Relax: most of it's not going anywhere.
19. Relax: you'll hit that perfect shave of all shaves next time.
20. Did I emphasize it enough? Apply. No. Pressure.
Posted by Craig Ceely at July 22, 2007 05:04 PM